Trending: twerking!?

If you follow any type of media, it's very likely that you've heard about the controversial performance by Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke at the recent VMAs (Video Music Awards). Although it's definitely not the first musical performance that has sparked controversy over the years, the word or dance that made this one go viral was "twerking".

So why the controversy?! Though this term may be new to many, it is one that has been around for awhile and actually has it's own definition in the online Urban Dictionary.The Urban Dictionary actually termed it their word of the day back in May.  Due to the nature of the definition you can choose to check it out for yourself, but one of the meanings is "a slutty dance derived from strip clubs".  Even the Oxford Dictionary included "twerk" in their new list of words this August.
After the performance, responses via social media and news broadcasts exploded.

Obviously the twerking that happened in the VMA performance sparked some outrage and was labeled things like crude, vulgar or disgusting by many.  Of course, there were some very tolerant comments stating that she is a performer and she was just doing what performers do - entertain.

You may now ask, How does this affect me as a parent!?  Quite possibly, your child or teen viewed the performance on the show that night.  If not, they most likely heard the buzz at school or social media. A few days after the performance, over a million results were tracked by Google for the term "twerking video", many of which were made and posted by kids.  Another way your teens may be affected is that because twerking has now become a popular trend, it may be an issue at school dances and parties.

Regardless of how your kids or teens may have been affected by this or any other trend that may be of concern to parents, it provides an opportunity for teachable moments.  One of the greatest ways to do this is to ask questions. Young people like to express their views and opinions and feel valued when people show genuine interest in their "world".  It's very possible parents may not agree with their child's view and may be quite surprised by their response, but open communication is key to a healthy and thriving relationship. 

What if?!....

photo source

What if we told our teenagers these things?!  What if they listened?!

• You are not your dress size.
• You are not your test score.
• You are not the number of points you scored at Friday's game.
• You are not the brand of clothes you wear.
• You are not your parents and their mistakes.
• You are not the team you made or the one you didn't.
• You are not your Facebook status.
• You are not your bad decisions in the past.
• You are not your addiction.
• You are not that rumor.
• You are not a stereotype.

• You are a unique individual who can offer the world what only you can offer.
• You have your entire life ahead of you. 
• You have unique talents.
• You were created for purpose.
• You are writing the chapters in your book called life.
• You are strong enough to say no! Try it.
• You have potential.
• You can get through.
• You are loved.
• You are amazing!

So what if we all told our teens these things and what if they really listened?! What would their world look like?  What would our world look like?